Service Station Food: WHY?

Shall we stop at the next service station for something to eat?”

The above is a question you should say no to. Avoid it at all costs. Unless you fancy a heart attack and violated senses by the constant aroma of piss and petrol.
As I stand in line surrounded by screaming kids and the sound of newspapers being rustled, satisfying the minds of the simple as they look at some nice perky breasts and who the latest overpaid lout to move to Manchester United is, my nose is coaxed away from the smell of petrol and taken over by the smell of a buffet of comfort food dishes that surprisingly look as appetising as a Gordon Ramsay Christmas turkey. Great! An upside to stopping here…

Sausage, Mashed Potato, Peas and Gravy please.”

Ahh… naivety, something that still plagues me.

Giant Yorkshire Pudding, mate?”

Result. Or so I thought.

You see, the people that provide us the food at these places may as well provide the food for aeroplanes, hospitals and that God awful stuff we got served at school. And for all we know actually do, because what I got served may have looked like a Ramsay dish but it certainly tasted like a 5 year old kids attempt at a masterchef final.

Gravy as thick as caramel. Mash that you could use to cement a wall together with. And sausages that are capable of hammering in a nail. The best part of the meal was a small spoonful of garden peas that were so tasteless they were a satisfying escape from the rest of the meal.

I need to go get something else I thought. WHSmith, no I cant eat overpriced crisps and chocolate for dinner. Burger King, Oh great…

Can I have an order of high cholesterol and a side order of cardiac arrest please.”

Marks and sparks it is then as a last option for a sandwich that bankrupts me and is about as filling as a tic tac. This crazy place is reminiscent of a school lunch time. Jamie Oliver needs to get off his arse and change the food in here too.

This is a terrible state were living in, in this country. The food we’re served in the places that are supposed to be giving us good nutritional food for sustenance during school, while were in hospital or when we’re on a long drive are giving us nothing but addictive, chemical filled, overpriced processed tripe that’s not even good enough for your dog to eat.

They hit us with the age old fast food advertising trick. They show us pictures by professional photographers of food that is supposed to be the stuff you get given when you order it that are really pictures of food stylist altered grub that is nothing like the food you really get. When have you ever had a Big Mac that looked like the picture above your head when you order? I certainly have never! I can certainly say that making your own school dinners and driving snacks is probably the only safe way to eat in these fast food times.

Remember, you are what you eat, so don’t be a bag of harmful chemicals and saturated fats.

Image © Motorwayservices.org

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